Little Johnny was sitting in class one day and the teacher said: "Today we will learn multi-syllables. Does any one know any? Little Johnny stood up and said: "masturbate" wow said the teacher that's a mouth full. No miss Jones, you are thinking of a blow job!

Little Johnny was watching T.V. and he heard people talking about politics. So he asked his dad "what are politics?” The dad says, "Johnny, let me tell you what politics are in my own words. Since I am the breadwinner of the family I am the capital. Since mommy deals with all the bills and taxes she is the government. Nanny is the working class since she takes care of you, you are the people and Danny (little brother) is the future." Then Johnny goes off and that night he hears Danny crying. So he goes in the room and notices that he pooped in his pants. Then he goes to his mom's room and she is ignoring him and telling him to go back to bed. So then he goes to the nanny’s room and finds his dad screwing her, so he leaves them alone and just forgets about Danny's poop in his pants. The next morning Johnny tells his dad what politics are in his own words. "Daddy, Daddy, I understand completely what politics are now. When the government is ignoring the people, the Capitol is screwing the working class and the future is in deep shit.

The teacher was very impressed with Timmy's answer to her question so she told him to come up to the front of the class, close his eyes and hold out his hands for a surprise. "But first," she said, "You have to guess what it is."

"A toy?" "No." "A new pencil?" "No." "A basketball?" "No...." said the teacher as she held the Hershey's kiss right above his opened hands. "Let me give you a hint. It's something your dad asks you mom for every day before he leaves for work."

"Don't touch it, Timmy!!" yells little Johnny. "It's a piece of ass!"

Little Johnny and Suzie play on the swing set every day after school. One day, little Johnny goes home after school and asks his father, "What’s this thing between my legs, daddy?" His father replies, "That's your truck, son. You want to park that in a girl's garage"

The very same day, Suzie goes home and asks her mother, "Mommy, what's this between my legs?" Her mother smiles and replies, "That is your garage, honey. You NEVER want to let a boy park his truck in there."

Both of the kids go to school the next day, and like always, they play on the swing set afterwards. Suzie goes home after a while, and her mother is shocked to see blood all over Suzie's face and clothes.

"Suzie, What happened??" She cried. "Oh nothing, mom. Little Johnny tried to park his truck in my garage, so I bit off his back two tires!!"