Osama bin Laden and one of his followers were riding on a camel when they stopped at a small town. Bin Laden gets off the camel and lifts up its tail and looks at the camel's butt, just then a guy comes over and says, "What are you doing?"

Osama replies, "About 2 miles back I heard someone say, 'Hey, look at the two assholes on that camel.'"

While running from American troops, across the desert, Ossama stumbles across an ornate jar. Curiously he opens it and a beautiful female genie comes out.
"Oh master, thank you for freeing me. I will grant you a wish"
"I don't need any wish from a female,” he said haughtily
This pisses the genie off but she insists that he make a wish.
"Oh very well. I want to wakeup in the morning with three American white women."
So the next morning he woke up in bed with Lorena Bobbit, Tanya Harding and Hillary Clinton. His dick was cut off, his legs were broke and he had no medical insurance.

Osama is worry about his future and calls Miss Cleo for advice. She said " Osama it does not look good at all you are going to die! Osama nervously asked, " When, When will I die?” Miss Cleo said, "It will be on an American holiday". "Which American holiday?” Miss Cleo said, "It does not matter. “When you die it will be an American holiday".

At a 2004 press conference to update the situation in Afghanistan, military officials made it public that Osama Bin Laden, had indeed changed his name to Osama Bin Runninlikeasissy.