Cannibal #1: "I hate my mother-in-law."

Cannibal #2: "Well, then just eat the noodles."

Entering the cannibal village, the missionary took the precaution of informing the chief that he was a strict vegetarian. “That’s okay.” Said the chief, looking the newcomer over.
“Here we all are strict humanitarians

Two cannibals meet one day. The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender Missionary. I've baked them, I've roasted them, I've stewed them, I've barbecued them, I've tried every sort of marinade. I just cannot seem to get them tender."
The second cannibal asks, "What kind of Missionary do you use?"

The other replied, "You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and they're sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads."

"Ah, ha!" the second cannibal replies. "No wonder ... those are friars!"

Did you hear about the cannibal who passed his brother in the woods?