During a terrible snowstorm, all the highway signs were covered with snow. The following spring, the state decided to raise all the signs twelve inches at a cost of 7 million dollars. “That’s an outrageous price!” said a local farmer, “but I guess we are lucky the state handled it instead of the federal government.”
“Why’s that?”
“Because knowing the federal government, they’d decide to lower all the highways.”

The country has progressed. Washington couldn’t tell a lie. Now everyone does.

The reason congressmen try so hard to get re-elected is that they would hate to have to make a living under the laws they’ve passed.