An old couple was short of cash, so the husband decided to send his wife out, on the game, to earn some extra money.
The old girl was gone for 4 days and she came home looking exhausted and put $149-50 on the table.
Her indignant husband said: "Which miserable sob gave you 50 cents?"
She replied: "They all did."

Two old guys are playing golf. Bob has bad eyesight, and Jim is senile. Bob tees off and his ball goes flying into the distance, so he loses sight of it.
Bob: "Did you see my ball?"
Jim: "Yes."
Bob: "Well, where did it go?"
Jim: "I can't remember."

A curious kid comes running to an elderly man, who is reading a book, and asks him " What are you reading?" The elderly man answers, “A history book".
The kid looks at what the elderly man is reading and says, "But that’s a book about sex!"
And the man said, "Yeah, but for me is history!"

A little old man is taking his evening walk when he sees a woman with perfect breasts.
He gets closer and says to her, “Hey lady would let me bite your breasts for $500?” “Are you crazy?!! She replies and keeps walking away. He keeps a few steps behind and makes another offer; “Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000 dollars?” the woman turns back and says, “Listen you; I’m not that kind of a woman! Got it?” But the very determine old man walking a few feet behind says; “Would you let me bite your breast just once for $10,000 dollars?” The woman stops, thinks about it for a while and says,
“Hmmm, $10,000 dollars; OK, just once, but lets go to that dark alley.” They go to the alley, where she takes off her top to reveal the most gorgeous breast he has ever seen. He grabs them and starts fondling them slowly, caressing them, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them, but not biting them. The woman gets annoyed and asks, “Well? Are you going to bite them or not?” “Nah,” says the old man…. “Cost too much…”