Little Johnny's mother took him to a local department store one morning to see Santa,
As Little Johnny was approaching Santa, Santa asked "and what do you want for Christmas little boy?" followed by a laughter of HO! HO! HO!
Little Johnny replied, well that's mighty generous of you Santa, but one 'HO' will do me just fine!

Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse’s legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, “Dad, why are you doing that?” His father replied, “Because when I’m buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Johnny, looking worried, said, “Dad, I thing the UPS guy wants to buy Mom.”

Little Johnny was very curious, and one day he decided to sneak into a strip club to see what it was like.
He waited until the bouncer’s back was turn and scurried quietly to the front of the club, where he watched the strippers dance. When they had removed nearly all of their clothing he bolted out the door and ran down the street as fast as he could. He was running so fast he smacked right into a man and fell back on his bottom. “What’s wrong young man?” asked the adult. “You look like you just saw a ghost!” “My mommy and daddy told me that if I ever watched anybody undress, I’d turn to stone. Well I was watching two ladies and all of a sudden I felt something hard!”

“You don’t seem to like the new tutor,” his mother said.
“I hate her,” screamed little Johnny, “I’d like to grab her and biter her on the back of the neck like daddy does.”