There's nothing worse than a snotty doctor's receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this. You got to love the way this old guy handled it.

An older man walked into a crowded doctor's office. As he approached the desk, the receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing the doctor for today?"
"There's something wrong with my dick," he replied. The receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a crowded office and say things like that."
"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said. The receptionist replied, "You've obviously caused some embarrassment in this room full of people.
You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the doctor in private. The man replied, "You shouldn't ask people things in a room full of others, if the answer could embarrass anyone."

The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered. The receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes?" "There's something wrong with my ear," he stated.
The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?" "I can't piss out of it," the man replied.
The doctor's office erupted in laughter.

A doctor takes off his glasses, rubs his eyes, and says to Mr. Smith, “I have some bad news. The tests results came back positive for cancer. Now, I can help you through this with counseling. I have a one o’clock tee time, why don’t you join me.”
They go to the golf course, and on the first tee the patient runs into a few guys he knows and he tells them he is dying of AIDS. Curious, the doctor asks, “Why are you telling everyone you are dying of AIDS when in fact you are dying of cancer?”
The guy looks at the doctor and in a very low voice says, “I don’t want any of my friends sleeping with my wife after I die.”

A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral.
A 'huge heart' covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service. Following the eulogy, the huge heart opened, and the cardiologists' casket rolled inside. The heart then closed sealing the cardiologist within the beautiful heart forever.
One of the mourners burst into laughter. When confronted, he said:
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral ----
I'm a gynecologist."
At that point, the proctologist fainted.

“Dr. Smith.” Said the woman in a very deep voice, I – I hate to say it, but I thing you overdid it on the hormone pills.”
“Don’t worry,” the doctor assured her. “A deep voice is a natural development. It will only last a few days.”
“But I’ve also noticed hair on my chest,” she said.
“Really? And how far down does it reach.”
She replied, “All the way to my balls.”