A little boy and a little girl, both about eight years old, were playing
in the sandbox. Unexpectedly, the little boy farts, causing a little
sand between his legs to shift. The little girl notices, and squeals
with laughter, "How'd you do that?"
"Easy," he exclaimed, "I just farted!"
"Can I try it?" she asks.
"Sure," he says, "anybody can do it."
She concentrates as she strains and grunts. Suddenly, there's a huge
explosion, the sides of the sandbox fly off, all the sand flies out. The
little boy is thrown 20 feet, ending up against a tree. He groggily gets
to his feet, runs back to where the little girl is. He finds her laying
on the ground out cold, flat on her back, spread eagled.
Curiously, he lifts up her dress, peeks underneath, and loudly exclaims
"Just what I thought......
...DUAL EXHAUST!"

Q: What’s the difference between a BMW and a porcupine...?
A: In a BMW, the pricks on the inside...

Always wear clean underwear in public, especially when working under your vehicle... From the Northwest Florida Daily News comes this story of a Crestview couple who drove their car to Wal-Mart, only to have their car break down in the parking lot. The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car in the lot.

The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection, she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones.

Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, she quickly put her hand up his shorts, and tucked everything back into place.

On regaining her feet, she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by. The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his forehead.

Q. What's the best way to kill a man?
A. Put a six-pack and a naked woman in front of him and ask him to choose Just one.