Boris Yeltsin, Bill Clinton & Ernesto Zedillo (Mexican President) are in France in a restaurant. The waiter asks "le apperitif?" All of them answer "oui!"
The waiter looks at Zedillo "Le tequila?" Zedillo: "oui!"
The waiter looks at Yeltsin "Le vodka?" Yeltsin: "oui!"
Finally, the waiter looks at Clinton " Le whisky?" Clinton: "DON'T MENTION THAT BITCH

Possible Titles for Monica's Autobiography
"I Suck At My Job"
"What Really Goes Down In The White House"
"How I Blew It In Washington"
"Work Hard to Find the Softer Side of the President"
"Clear and Present Boner"
"Testing the Limits of the Gag Rule"
"Going Back for Gore"
"Podium Girl"
"Secret Services to the President"

Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and Newt Gengrich were on their way to meet the wizard of OZ.
When they met, Al Gore asked for a brain, Newt asked for a heart, and Bill asked "where's Dorothy?"

Monica took a dress to a different Dry Cleaner than her usual cleaner. Unfortunately it was an older gentleman hard of hearing. Monica says, "I would like this dress cleaned". The old boy says "come again". Monica says, "No sir that is just Miracle Whip from my sandwich".