Ole says to Sven, “Hey Sven, how long have you been wearing that brassiere?”
And Sven sys “Ever since my wife discovered it in my saddlebag!”

A drunk staggers into a bar demanding a beer. He argues back and forth with the bartender, who refuses to serve him. Finally, the bartender challenges him to get on the floor and do twenty push-ups to prove he is sober.
As he is doing the push-ups, another drunk staggers in. He surveys the scene for a minute, pokes the guy in the ribs with his shoe, and says, “Hey fella, I think your girlfriend has gone home.”

They've updated and remodeled a supermarket near my house. It now has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh.
Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and experience the scent of fresh hay.
When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.
The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn.
I don't buy toilet paper there any more.

A guy leaves for work but, when he is about a mile from home, he realizes that he’s left some important papers on his desk. He drives back home, and as he walks by the bedroom, he sees his wife lying naked in a compromising position and the milkman, also naked, standing at the side of the bed. When he spies the husband, the milkman quickly squats over the rug. “I’m so glad you’re here, Mr. Shaw,” he says. “I was just telling your wife that if she didn’t pay the bill for her milk bath, I would crap on your rug.”