Tire of having to stare at the gorgeous young kitten on the other side of the chain link fence, bold Spot Tomcat decide to visit her one afternoon. Settling back on his haunches, he gave a mighty leap and landed on the other side; impressed the lovely cat strolled over. “That was quite a leap,” she remarked. “Want to go somewhere and cuddle?”
“I’m afraid not,” said Spot, a hurt expression on his face. “The fence was higher that I thought.”

Q: Where do dogs go when they lose their tails?
A: To the retail store.

A squirrel was sitting in an apple tree when all of a sudden a cow came climbing up the tree. Surprised to see a climbing cow the squirrel asked the newcomer "What in hell are you doing here". The cow's answer was "I thought I'd eat some oranges" so the squirrel told him "But this is an apple tree". And to that the cow answered, "I know. I brought my own".

How did a cow freeze to death in the middle of July?
He crossed over to a corn field and it was soooo
hot the corn popped into popcorn and the cow thought
it was snow and therefore he froze to death.