A woman walked into a pharmacy and told the pharmacist that she needed
some cyanide. The pharmacist said, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"
The woman then explained she needed it to poison her husband.
The pharmacist's eyes got big and he said, "Lord, have mercy --
I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law!
I'll lose my license; they'll throw you and I in jail. Just leave and forget you ever came in here before I call the police. The woman reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well, now. You didn't tell me you had a prescription.”

1. Artery: The study of Paintings.
2. Barium: What Doctors do when patients die.
3. Caesarean Section: A neighborhood in Rome.
4. Cauterize: Made eye contact with her.
5. Colic: A sheep dog.
6. D & C: Where Washington is.
7. Dilate: To live long.
8. Enema: Not a friend.
9. Fibula: A small lie.
10. Genital: Not Jewish.
11. G.I. Series: Military Ball Game
12. Impotent: Distinguished, well known
13. Labor Pain: Getting hurt at work.
14. Morbid: A higher offer.
15. Nitrates: Cheaper than day rates.
16. Node: Was aware of.
17. Outpatient: A person who has fainted.
18. Pap Smear: Fatherhood Test.
19. Post Operative: Letter Carrier
20. Recovery Room: Place to do upholstery.
21. Seizure: Roman Emperor.
22. Tablet: Small table.
23. Terminal Illness: Getting sick at the airport.
24. Urine: Opposite of "You're out".

Q: What's the difference between a gynecologist and a geneologist?
A: One looks up the family tree, and the other looks up the family bush.

Q: Why did the man cross the road?
A: He heard the chicken was a slut.