Two farmers walking through a field. One stoops down and dips his fingers in some cow dung and rubs it across his lips. The second farmer asks him why he did such a disgusting thing. The first one replies,’ I have chapped lips!’ The second one asks him,’ Does it make them better?' He replies,' No! But it stops you licking them!'

Q. Why do cowgirl’s thighs stay raw?
A. Cowboys don’t take their hats off for nothing!

Two cows were talking in the field one day.
First Cow: "Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that's going around?"
Second Cow: "Yeah, makes you glad you're a penguin, doesn't it?"

This small Farm town had a vegetable fair to see who grew the biggest and best vegetables at harvest time and every year the same old man won first place. So one day his young and beautiful next-door neighbor asked him "How do you grow such big tomatoes Mister?" The man hesitated for a minute and whispered "Well honey, every morning at dawn, I take my robe off and flash the garden. " The young woman was intrigued by his strategy and decided to try it also. The following season the woman knocked on the old man's door. The man came out and the girl confessed that she had been flashing her garden also but showed him that her tomatoes weren't any better than before. After showing him the vegetables the young woman said, "My tomatoes may not be great, but you should see my cucumbers!"