A drunk had passed out in an alley way and along came a queer. The queer looked about and, not seeing anyone, pulled down the drunk’s pants and screwed him in the ass. When he finished he placed a $20.00 in the drunk's pocket. The next morning the drunk was searching his pockets for a cigarette when he discovered the $20.00 bill. He immediately dashed to the corner liquor store and asked for $20.00 worth of the cheapest wine in the house. He received 4 bottles of wine and proceeded to drink every drop. He passed out in the same alley way and along came the same queer. Not seeing anyone about, he remembered how good it was the night before so he pulled down the drunk’s pants and screwed him in the ass, again. Again he tucked a $20.00 in the drunk's pocket. In the morning the drunk found the $20.00 and headed for the same liquor store. Again he asked for $20.00 worth of the cheapest wine in the house. Again he received 4 bottles. Again he drank every drop. Again he passed out in the same alleyway. Along came this same queer, only this time he had a friend with him. After removing the ole boy's trousers they both screwed him in the ass. When they finished they both placed a $20.00 bill in his pocket. The next morning the drunk found the $40.00 and high tailed it to the same liquor store. Upon entering the clerk said, "I know! You want #20.00 worth of the cheapest wine I've got in the house." "Nope!" the wino said. "I want $40.00 worth of the best wine you've got in the house. That cheap stuff makes my asshole sore!"

This man was driving on the highway and runs a red light. The passenger says "didn't you see that light? It was red." The driver says "my brother runs reds all the time." So then they come to a nother red light and runs the red light. Once again the passenger says didn't you see that red light?" The driver once again says "My brother does it all the time." So then they come up to a GREEN light and they stop. Then The passenger says the light is green, you can go." Then the driver says "My brother might be coming."

An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, "Have you ever been arrested?"
He answered, "No."

The next question, intended for people who had answered in the affirmative to the last one, was "Why?" The applicant answered it anyway: "Never got caught."

A young man who traveled a good deal liked to collect exotic pieces of art. He displayed one of his treasures, an ancient fertility symbol, on the fireplace mantel. One evening he brought an attractive lady back to his place. “Excuse me for just a moment,” he said
“Let me fix a couple of drinks.”
While he was gone, the woman looked around the living room and suddenly stopped in front of the statuette. When the man came back, she asked him what it was.
“Oh,” said he, a little embarrassed, “that’s called a phallus.”
“Thanks,” she replied. “I’d hate to tell you what it looks like.”