A hot girl walks into the "women doctors" office and sits down. The doctor knocks lightly and then comes in. He sees that the woman is extremely hot. He walks up and wastes no time, he slides his hands up her shirt and starts caressing her boobs and says, "do you know what I’m doing. " she says "yes! You are feeling for cancer right?" he says, "yeah, o yeah." After that he starts taking off the woman’s pants and starts massaging her thighs and says, "do you know what I’m doing now?" she thinks and says "yes! You are feeling for cancer right?" he says a yeah that’s it, feeling for cancer. After that he pulls off his pants gets on top of her and says "do you know what I’m doing now?" she says "O DOC yes I do your getting genital warts and that’s why I came here!!!!!!!!!!!

A boy comes home from school and says to his mom,” I lost my virginity today".
His mom replies angrily, "You tell your father about what you've done, when he gets home!" His dad comes home about twenty minutes later and he tells his dad that he lost his virginity. His dad says, "Good job son! How was it?
Then the son says, "It was pretty good Dad, but do you have any Vaseline? My ass hurts."

A man had just opened a restaurant but he couldn't think of a name. So he decided to name it after the third person that walks in. The third person walks in and the guy asked for her name. She said "Jill." "Well Jill, you have nice legs."
So the guy named the restaurant "Jill's Legs." A week later a drunk was laying on the sidewalk outside the restaurant when a police officer asked him what he was doing. He replied: "I'm waiting for Jill's Legs to open so I can get a bite to eat."

Two women had been having a friendly lunch when the subject turned to
sex. "You know, John and I have been having some sexual problems"
Linda told her friend.
That's amazing!" Mary replied, "So have Tom and I. We're thinking of
going to a sex therapist" said Linda.
"Oh, we could never do that! We'd be too embarrassed!" responded
Mary. "But after you go, will you please tell me how it went?"
Several weeks passed and they met for lunch again. "So, how did
the sex therapy work out, Linda?"

"Things couldn't be better!” Linda exclaimed. "We began with a
physical exam, and afterward the doctor said he was certain he could
help us. He told us to stop at the grocery store on the way home and
buy a bunch of grapes and a dozen donuts. He told us to sit on the
floor nude, and toss the grapes and donuts at each other. Every
grape that went into my vagina, John had to get it out with his
tongue. Every donut that I ringed his penis with, I had to eat. Our
sex life is wonderful, in fact it's better than it's ever been!"

With that endorsement, Mary talked her husband into an appointment
with the same sex therapist. After the physical exams were completed
the doctor called Mary and Tom into his office. "I'm afraid there is
nothing I can do for you," he said.

But doctor," Mary complained, "You did such good for Linda and John,
surely you must have a suggestion for us! Please, please, can't you
give us some help? Any help at all?"

"Well, OK," the doctor answered. "On your way home, I want you to
stop at the grocery store and buy a sack of apples and a box of
Cheerios..."