I've got a billiard ball stuck up my arse!
Get on the end of the queue

Some More Tests

"I'd like to run some more tests."
I can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this one

A man wraps himself up inclear plastic wrap and goes off to his appointment with the psychiatrist. When he enters the room the psychiatrist says: "I can see you are nuts."

Dennis is worried about the size of his penis, so he goes to see a doctor. The doctor says, “Here take these pills every day for a week.” Dennis is so frustrated that the first night he downs the whole bottle. A couple of days late, he and his wife go back to see the doctor.
Dennis says, “Doc, take a look at this.” He takes off his pants, and he’s got a five foot dick that reaches the floor.
The doctor says, “Goodness I’m going to have to operate.” His wife says, “How long do you think my husband will be in crutches?”
The doctor says, “On crutches?” She says, “You are going to lengthen his legs, aren’t you?