It was around 8:00 on a Friday night. Farmer Johnson was sitting in his living room
listening to his radio when he heard a knock at his door. He stood up and answered the door. The young man standing there said "My name is Joe, I’m here for Flo we are going to the show is she ready to go?"
The farmer called his daughter down the stairs, and she and her date left.
A little while later another young man knocked at the door, and when the farmer answered the door, the young man said, "My name is Eddie, I'm here for Betty, and we’re going steady, is she ready?"
The farmer called his second daughter down the stairs, and she and her date left.
Not too long after that, another young man knocked at the door.
the farmer again answered the door. The young man standing there said, "My name is Chuck, and I drive a truck..."
Before the young man could say another word the farmer shot him dead on the spot.

You know you've met a redneck if you see someone looking for a card that says "Happy Birthday, Uncle Daddy!"

Q. How can you tell if you are staying in a red neck hotel?

A. If you call to the front desk and say you have got a leak in your sink and they say go
ahead

A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Austin to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Redneck says, "I want my $20 million."
The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you a million today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 years."
The Redneck said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it."
Again, the man explains that he would only get a million that day and the rest during the next 19 years. Furious with the man the redneck screams out "Look, I want my money. If you're not going to give me my $20 million right now, then I want my dollar back!"