Q. Why do men whistle while they're on the toilet?
A. Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe

Q. What did the lesbian vampire say to her girl friend?
A. I'll see you next month.

Three men were fishing and one man says, "I think I caught something” so he reels it in. it was a magic lamp. A genie popped out of it and said "I’ll grant you 3 wishes one each" the first guy said 'I want to be 2 times as smart as I am now' so the genie snapped his fingers and he started saying all this shakes beer stuff that he's never heard before. The second guy says 'alright, I want to be 3 times as smart as I am now.' so the genie snaps his fingers and he starts saying all this world war two stuff that he's never heard before. Then the third guy says "I want to be ten times as smart as I am now” the genie says 'no you don’t’ the guy says 'yeah, I do’ the genie gives in and snaps his fingers an turns him into a girl.

Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
A. They all already have boyfriends!