In Rio on a business trip, Sam found himself hampered, after working hours, by the fact that he did not know the language. He was at once delighted and dismayed, therefore, when a surpassingly beautiful young Brazilian woman with a plunging neckline sat down at his restaurant table.
“Do you speak English?”
“Si,” she said with a bright white smile, “bot jus’ a leetle beet.”
“Just a little bit, eh?” Sam repeated joshing. “How much?”
“Ninety-five dollars,” was the prompt reply.

The crowded elevator had just begun to rise when one of the young women on board screamed and said, “I’ve been geesed!” “You mean you have been goosed?” Asked the man in front of her. “Listen, buddy, I know how to count,” came her reply.

What floor, please?” asked the hotel elevator operator, and a young man at the back of the car called out, “Ballroom, please.” At which the man in front of him turned and said, “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I was crowding you.”

A note outside a place of worship where women are not allowed: “it is illegal to enter a women, even if dressed like a man"!!