A mother was teaching her 3-year-old the Lord's prayer. For several evenings at bedtime she repeated it after her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo. The mother listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer.
"Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen."

While other people go to church every Sunday morning, Charles, a farmer, likes to sit in the village restaurant drinking wine.
One day the priest said to him, “Charles, I’m afraid we shall not see each other in heaven.”
A worried Charles replied, “But, father, what on earth have you done?”

Do you know what hide and go seek is called when you play it in a church building? Seeking the Lost!

A man walks into the forest and sees a revelation from God. So he asks, "God what is time to you?" God answers him, "A second for me is a million years for you." The man exclaims, "Wow, and what is money to you?" God answers, "A penny of mine is worth a million dollars of yours." The man is overwhelmed so he asks, "God, can I have one penny of yours?" God says to him, "Sure just a second