How do you get two piccolos to play in perfect unison?
Shoot one.

Q: How do you know when a drummer is knocking at your door?
A: The knocking keeps speeding-up then slowing-down and he doesn't know when to come in.

What do you call a trombone player in the street?
A beggar.

How many concert band flute players does it take to change a lightbulb?
They ask their boyfriend to do it for them.